今日精选的沙雕句子 搞笑逗比（值得分享）
今天天气预报有大雨 ，出门记得带沐浴露哦。
Today"s weather forecast has heavy rain, remember to take shower gel when you go out.
如果睡觉是给人体充电，那么我从来没有满格过。
If sleeping is to charge the body, then I"ve never been full.
我最大的优点是认清自己身上的缺点，而我最大的缺点是改不掉这些缺点。
My biggest advantage is to recognize my own shortcomings, and my biggest disadvantage is that I can"t get rid of them.
你要相信，相信我们会像童话故事里，青蛙和恐龙是结局。
You have to believe, believe that we will be like a fairy tale, frog and dinosaur is the end.
女人问男人：你猜我们最喜欢你们男人什么大？什么粗？什么硬？男人微微一笑满脸通红哑口无语。女人：笨蛋！告诉你吧，财大气粗腰杆硬！
Women ask men: guess what we like most about your men? What"s thick? What"s hard? The man smiles a little, his face turns red and he is speechless. Woman: stupid! I"ll tell you, you"re rich, you"re strong!
人生就是这样，有欢笑也有泪水。一部分人主要负责欢笑，另外一部分人主要负责泪水。
Life is like this, there are laughter and tears. Some people are mainly responsible for laughter, others are mainly responsible for tears.
我什么都要，就是不要脸，什么都吃，就是不吃亏。
I want everything, but I don"t want to be shameful. I eat everything, but I don"t suffer.
算命的老头看了看我的手相，在看了看我的面相，突然跪在地上说了一句：吾皇万岁万岁万万岁。
The old fortune teller looked at my palm and then my face, and suddenly knelt down on the ground and said: long live the emperor, long live the emperor.
拧不开瓶盖的都嫁人了，拧得开的都自己拧着。
Those who can"t open the bottle cap are married, and those who can open the bottle cap are screwed by themselves.
最快变成哲学家的是老公，最快变成经济学家的是老婆，最快变成战略家的是丈母娘。
The fastest to become a philosopher is her husband, the fastest to become an economist is her wife, and the fastest to become a strategist is her mother-in-law.
如果当年牛顿是坐在榴莲树下，那么我们的考试应该会容易得多了。
If Newton had been sitting under the durian tree, our examination would have been much easier.
有一天，班主任收走了我的手机。等放假的那一天，班主任把手机还给我，我打开王者荣耀时，黄金变成了最强王者。
One day, the head teacher took away my mobile phone. On the day of the holiday, the head teacher returned my mobile phone. When I turned on the king"s glory, gold became the strongest king.
建议把上课用的椅子换成和中国好声音一样的转椅，学生觉得老师讲得好就转过来听。
It is suggested that the chair used in class should be replaced with a swivel chair which is the same as the voice of China. If students feel that the teacher speaks well, they should turn to listen.
从小学到大学，唯一不变的就是一颗不想念书的心。
From primary school to university, the only constant is a heart that does not miss books.
图源网，侵联删
想了解更多精彩内容，快来关注浅谚婉语