奥斯卡·王尔德：段子手鼻祖 聊爱情友情 谈人生成长（中英文）
奥斯卡·王尔德
Oscar Wilde
（1854年10月16日—1900年11月30日），
出生于爱尔兰都柏林
19世纪英国最伟大的作家与艺术家之一
唯美主义代表人物
以其剧作、诗歌、童话和小说闻名
150年来，这位一生都活在“怼人怼天怼地怼空气”的世界里，是目前世界范围内公认的最能怼的人。
他开口就能怼，出口成章，金句频出。
如果活在现代，所有的段子手估计都要封口，所有的毒舌达人估计都得拜师。
A man can be happy with any woman as long as he does not love her.
男人可以快乐的和任何女人相处,只要你不爱上她。
The heart was made to be broken.
心是用来敲碎的。
I like men who have a future and women who have a past
我喜欢有未来的男人和有过去的女人。
Hatred is blind, as well as love.
恨是盲目的，爱亦然。
It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances.
只有肤浅的人才不会以貌取人。
The very essence of romance is uncertainty.
浪漫的精髓就在于它充满种种可能。
The only difference between a caprice and a life-long passion is that the caprice lasts a little longer.
逢场作戏和终身不渝之间的区别只在于逢场作戏稍微长一些。
When one is in love, one always begins by deceiving one"s self, and one always ends by deceiving others. That is what would calls a romance.
恋爱总是以自欺开始，以欺人结束。这就是所谓的浪漫。
Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.
男女之间不可能存在友谊，有的只是爱恨情仇。
We women, as someone says, love with our ears, just as you men love with your eyes, if you ever love at all.
女人是用耳朵恋爱的，而你们男人如果会产生爱情的话，却是用眼睛来恋爱。
All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That is his.
所有的女人最后都变得像她的母亲。这正是她们的悲剧。男人从来不会这样。这正是他们的悲剧。
Men always want to be a woman"s first love. What women like is to be a man"s last romance.
男人经常希望自己是女人初恋的对象，女人则希望成为男人最后的罗曼史。
When a man has once loved a woman, he will do anything for her, except continue to love her.
男人一旦爱上一个女人,他愿意为她做一切事情,除了继续爱她。
Modern women understand everything, except their husbands.
现代女性什么都懂，就是不懂她们丈夫。
What is the chief cause of divorce? Marriage.
什么是离婚的主要原因？结婚。
When a woman marries again, it is because she detested her first husband. When a man marries again, it is because he adored his first wife. Women try their luck; men risk theirs.
女人再婚是因为讨厌第一个丈夫。男人再婚是因为爱第一个妻子。女人是要碰碰运气，男人是要冒冒险。
One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.
人们应该永远沉浸爱之中--这就是永远不要结婚的理由。
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
有些人一来大家就开心了;有些人一走大家就开心了。
A man is very apt to complain of the ingratitude of those who have risen far above him.
一个人易于抱怨那些地位比他高的人忘恩负义。
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
要永远原谅你的敌人,没什么事情比这个更让他们寝食难安。
宽恕不争，气死仇人。
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
不够真诚是危险的，太真诚则绝对是致命的。
There are many things that we would throw away, if we were not afraid that others might pick them up.
很多东西如果不是怕别人捡去，我们一定会扔掉。
To disagree with three-fourths of the British public is one of the first requisites of sanity.
与不列颠四分之三公众观点相左，乃是保持理智的首要之选。
Anybody can sympathise with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathise with a friend"s success.
来自敌人的成功可以忍，来自朋友的成功却不能忍。
Whenever people agree with me，I always feel I must be wrong.
每次人们赞同我的时候，我都觉得自己一定错了。
The reason we all like to think so well of others is that we are all afraid for ourselves. The basis of optimism is sheer terror.
我们之所以把别人想得很好，是因为我们大家都替自己担心。乐观主义的基础纯粹是恐惧。
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
一个人在选择敌人的时候无论再谨慎都不为过。
You like everyone; that is to say, you are indifferent to everyone.
你喜欢所有人,这就是说,你对所有人都很冷漠。
One can always be kind to people one cares nothing about.
一个人总是可以善待他毫不在意的人。
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.
做你自己，因为别人都有人做了。
It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information.
当今社会无用信息如此之少，实为憾事。
Experience is the name every one gives to their mistakes.
每个人犯了错误，都说这是经验。
Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.
任何对于生活过于精打细算的人必定缺乏想象力。
One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.
手握王牌，勿须出千。
Everyone is born king, and most people die in exile.
每个人生来都是君王，但大多数在流亡中死去。
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
生活中只有两个悲剧：一个是没有得到你想要的，另外一个是得到了你想要的。
To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.
人生是世上最罕见的事情，大多数人只是行尸走肉，仅此而已。
I like to do all the talking myself. It saves time, and prevents arguments.
我喜欢自言自语，因为这样节约时间，而且不会有人跟我争论。
No man is rich enough to buy back his own past.
没有人富有到可以赎回自己的过去。
The truth is rarely pure and never simple
真相很少纯粹，也决不简单。
Only the shallow know themselves
只有浅薄的人才了解自己。
There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating--people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing.
只有两种人最具有吸引力，一种是无所不知的人，一种是一无所知的人。
The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius.
公众惊人地宽容。他们什么都能原谅，除了天才。
Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other.
人生就是一件蠢事与另一件蠢事接踵而来，而爱情则是两个蠢东西追来追去。
I don"t want to earn my living; I want to live.
我不想谋生；我想生活。
There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.
世界上只有一件事比被人议论还要糟糕，那就是不被议论。
All charming people, I fancy, are spoiled. It is the secret of their attraction.
我认为所有漂亮的人都是被宠坏了，而这就是他们能够吸引他人的秘密所在。
We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities.
在这个时代里，那些非必需品反而成了我们的必需品。
Fashion is usually a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
时尚是一种让人难以忍受的丑陋，以至于我们不得不每六个月就更改一次。
The commonest thing is delightful if only one hides it.
再普通的东西，只要你把它藏起来，它就讨人喜欢。
I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability.
我认为上帝造人多少有点高估了他的能力。
Seriousness is the only refuge of the shallow.
严肃是浅薄的唯一庇护所。
One"s real life is often the life that one does not lead.
真实生活通常就是我们无法掌控的生活。
I love acting. It is so much more real than life.
我喜欢演戏。戏比人生真实。
When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old I know that it is.
年轻的时候我以为钱就是一切，现在老了才知道，确实如此。
We teach people how to remember, we never teach them how to grow.
我们教给人们如何记忆，却从来不教他们如何成长。
There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written.
书无所谓道德的或不道德的。书有写得好的或写的糟的。仅此而已。
A man who does not think for himself does not think at all.
一个人倘若不为自己思考，那就从未思考过。
The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it... I can resist everything but temptation.
摆脱诱惑的唯一方法是向诱惑屈服。我能抵御一切--除了诱惑。
Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else"s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.
大多数人都是属于别人的人。他们的思想是他人的观点，他们的生活是一种模仿，他们的激情是一种引证。
Most people discover when it is too late that the only things one never regrets are one"s mistakes.
大多数人发现他们从未后悔的事情只是他们的错误，但发现时已经太晚了。
Men become old, but they never become good.
人们越活越老，但绝不会越活越好。
Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
自私不是一个人按照他自己的意愿生活，而是要求别人按照他的意愿生活。
In examinations the foolish ask questions that the wise cannot answer.
在考试里，愚昧的人总提问一些会令睿智的人答不上的问题。
To define is to limit.
定义一样东西，就意味着限制了它。
The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, and the young know everything.
老年人相信一切，中年人怀疑一切，青年人什么都懂。
Genius is born--not paid.
天才是天生的,买不来。
I am not young enough to know everything.
我还没有年轻到什么都懂的地步。
我太小,不能知道一切。
（那个才是王尔德的原意呢？）
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
我们生活在阴沟里，依然有仰望星空的权利。
My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or other of us has to go.
墙纸越来越破，而我越来越老，两者之间总有一个要先消失。
（王尔德遗言：1900年11月30日，于左岸旅店。）
这样一道闪耀着语言的智慧光芒的饕餮大餐，好好品味吧！
图片选自网络，版权为原作者所有！