美女必备的搞笑沙雕句 笑出猪叫（赶走一整天坏心情）
一、摆地摊要研究消费场景，要寻找有可能成交的客户，我已经想好了，明天去健身房门口卖炸鸡可乐。
I"ve already made up my mind to go to the gym door to sell fried chicken coke tomorrow to study the consumption scene and find customers who are likely to make a deal.
二、好久没发朋友圈啦， 大家最近怎么样，大小便正常吗？
I haven"t made friends for a long time. How are you doing recently? Are you urinating and defecating normally?
三、谁说男的不注意细节，打团的时候，你技能慢放一秒他都注意到了
Who said that men don"t pay attention to details? When playing a group, he noticed that your skills were slow for a second
四、我才幼儿园毕业十几年 就已经欠下了五元的巨款
I have owed a huge sum of five yuan since I graduated from kindergarten for more than ten years
五、一个朋友98年的，就说要去植发，我心里感叹这才多大呀，就挣够植发的钱了。
When a friend was in 1998, he said he was going to have a hair transplant. I lamented in my heart how old it was, and I earned enough money for hair transplant
六、我梦见你感冒了 然后急匆匆地出去买药 然后有辆大卡车把我撞死了 结果醒了发现是梦 不然你该没药吃了。
I dreamt that you had a cold, then rushed out to buy medicine, and then a big truck killed me, only to wake up and find it was a dream, otherwise you would have no medicine to eat.
七、早点回家 最近猪肉比较贵我怕你出事。
Go home early. Pork is more expensive recently. I"m afraid something will happen to you.
八、工地上的砖你是一块不搬 网络上的鸡汤你是碗碗先干。
Bricks on the construction site, you are a piece of chicken soup on the internet, and you do it first.
九、之前喜欢一个男孩子 听说他打和平精英很厉害 于是我开始苦练 日夜疯狂游戏 一个月后我把他忘得一干二净
I liked a boy before and heard that he was very good at fighting the elite of peace, so I began to practice hard day and night in crazy games. A month later, I forgot all about him
十、微信是我申请的消息我想回就回不想回就不回
WeChat is the news I applied for. If I want to go back, I won"t go back if I don"t want to
十一、我在2楼的阳台上 坐了4小时 情绪失控6次 左眼皮跳了93下 心痛了一晚上 始终不知道我那5块钱到底怎么丢的。
I sat on the balcony on the second floor for 4 hours and lost my emotions. Six times, my left eyelid jumped 93 times and my heart ached all night. I still don"t know how I lost my five dollars
十二、现在的女孩子都很爱吃水果啊 草莓 菠萝 芒果啊都种在脖子上。
Nowadays girls love fruits, strawberries, pineapples and mangoes, which are all planted around their necks
十三、五个人同时追我 我能怎么办 只能送上我的人头了。
Five people chased me at the same time. What can I do? I have to send it to my head
十四、我平常在家都叫男朋友宝贝，偶尔撒娇叫声老公，在外面为了不张扬都是叫王俊凯。
I usually call my boyfriend baby at home, occasionally cry my husband in pettish, and I always call Karry outside in order not to make public.
十五、我想我可能是蚯蚓因为我喜欢泥。
I think I may be an earthworm because I like mud.
十六、不是吧 别的小姐姐穿紧身衣你叫她美女 我穿紧身衣你捧个键盘说坦克按f键。
Oh, come on. Other little sisters wear tights. You call her beauty. I wear tights. You hold a keyboard and say that the tank presses the F key
十七、有趣的姑娘都单身 因为她们一个人 就可以撑起无聊的岁月 很难找到比自己还有趣的人 今后的路 我希望你好好走下去 而我坐车。
Interesting girls are single because they can support the boring years alone, and it is difficult to find someone more interesting than themselves. I hope you can go on well and I will take a bus
十八、有人约架请告诉我，不用告诉我多少人，告诉我时间地点就行，因为你们不管多少人我都看。
Please tell me if someone has an appointment. You don"t have to tell me how many people, just tell me the time and place, because I can see no matter how many of you.
十九、你喜欢德国表 日本表 瑞士表还是我这迷人的外表。
Do you like German watches, Japanese watches, Swiss watches or my charming appearance?
二十、果你愿意一层一层的翻来我的作业，你会发现，你会惊异，这页没写，那页也没写。
If you are willing to turn over my homework layer by layer, you will find that you will be amazed that this page is not written and that page is not written.
二十一、我总以为自己是独一无二的 直到需要起一个用户名的时候。
I always thought I was unique until I needed a user name.
二十二、每次坐公交地铁 看见孕妇我都主动让座 生怕我婆婆动了胎气。
Every time I see a pregnant woman by bus and subway, I take the initiative to give up my seat for fear that my mother-in-law will become angry.