句子不长 但幽默性极强（越看越开心）

1、我这辈子只有两件事不会，这也不会，那也不会。

There are only two things I can"t do in my life, neither this nor that.

2、为什么经常在学校犯困呢？因为学校是梦开始的地方。

Why do you often feel sleepy at school? Because school is where dreams begin.

3、我有两个朋友吵架了，我左劝右劝，他们就是不肯打架。

Two of my friends quarreled. I tried to persuade them, but they refused to fight.

4、有时候挺讨厌自己的，不会说话，太过善良，没什么心眼，还这么可爱。

Sometimes I hate myself, I can"t speak, I"m too kind, I have no heart, and I"m so lovely.

5、靠近我之前，你要考虑清楚，除了美貌我一无所有。

Before you get close to me, you have to think clearly that I have nothing but beauty.

6、真正有钱人都很低调的，就像我白天电动车送外卖，但是你们谁知道，我晚上风扇都是开三档。

The real rich people are very low-key, just like I deliver takeout by electric car during the day, but who knows, I turn on the third gear fan at night.

7、有很多事情，你当时想不通，别着急，过一段时间你再想，就想不起来了。

There are many things that you can"t figure out at that time. Don"t worry. After a while, you can"t think of them again.

8、为什么假期那么短，因为假期没有上午啊！

Why is the holiday so short, because there is no morning holiday!

9、今天朋友叫我下象棋，其实我根本不会下，我开局就用帅把他将吃了，朋友一愣，你这是什么走法，我说这叫帅到起飞。

Today, my friend told me to play chess. In fact, I can"t play chess at all. I used Shuai to eat him at the beginning. My friend was stunned. What"s your way? I said it"s called Shuai to take off.

10、每天最大的谎言就是：今天要早睡，明天要早起。

The biggest lie of every day is: go to bed early today and get up early tomorrow.

11、不想养狗，也不想养猫，想养你，毕竟养猪致富。

I don"t want to have a dog or a cat. I want to have you. After all, I want to get rich by raising pigs.

12、我太能吃了，我上辈子一定是胃无限。

I can eat too much. I must have a stomach in my last life.

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