18个搞笑的单身说说来了 句句搞怪（适合发朋友圈）
一、我现在才发现，我还真是个平平无奇的单身小天才呢。
I"m discovering now that I"m a single genius.
二、喂，有人收购闲置的宝贝吗？你看我怎么样？反正我这么闲着也是闲着。
Hello, anyone buy idle treasure? What do you think of me? I"m idle anyway.
三、为什么别人都有甜甜的恋爱。而我只有一个怕秃的脑袋。
Why others have sweet love. And I only have a bald head.
四、我的爱情可以晚点到，但是外卖不行。
My love can be late, but not takeout.
五、夏天没有对象没关系，但是没有空调、西瓜、手机不行。
It doesn"t matter if there is no object in summer, but there is no air conditioner, watermelon or mobile phone.
六、以后我要对我自己好一点，那些能怪男人的，就决不能怪自己。
In the future, I will treat myself better. Those who can blame men should never blame themselves.
七、国家发货真是太慢了，为什么这么多年了，我的对象还没送到。
The country delivers goods is really too slow, why so many years, my object has not delivered.
八、大家好，有需要电灯泡的吗？吃不吃饭不重要，我主要想想近距离看看所谓的爱情。
Anyone need a light bulb? It doesn"t matter whether I eat or not. I mainly want to take a closer look at the so-called love.
九、今天热烈庆祝我结束上半年的单身生活，现在我准备开始下半年的。
Today is a warm celebration of the end of my first half of the single life, now I am ready to start the second half of the year.
十、我是单身小天才，两手插兜，谁也不爱。
I am a single little genius, hands in the pocket, who also do not love.
十一、单身了这么多年，你别说是拧瓶盖了，就算给我消防栓，我都能给他拧开。
Single for so many years, you don"t have to twist the cap, even if I give fire hydrant, I can give him to twist off.
十二、未来要和我结婚的那位，我劝你现在少做点对不起我的事情。
The one who is going to marry me in the future, I advise you to do less wrong to me now.
十三、小朋友，你是否有许多的问号，为什么你单身了这么久还没人要。
Little friend, do you have a lot of question marks, why you are single for so long but no one wants.
十四、都说鱼和熊掌不可兼得，但是穷和单身却可以，因为你穷，所以你单身。
They say you can"t have your cake and eat it, but you can have your cake and eat it, because you are poor, you are single.
十五、每次去参加别人婚礼的时候，我都在想：到底什么时候才上菜啊？也不知道这是不是我至今单身的原因。
Every time I go to someone"s wedding, I think: When will the food be served? I don"t know if that"s why I"m single.
十六、有时候还挺羡慕那些舔狗的，至少他们还有对象接近，像我这种只敢看的，应该就叫做眺望狗吧。
Sometimes envy those who lick the dog, at least they have objects close to, like me this only dare to see, should be called overlooking the dog.
十七、看到别人秀恩爱，我就在想：我上辈子是不是得罪了月老，他是不是把我拉进黑名单了，不然为什么这么多年对我不闻不问。
To see others show love, I just think: I have sinned against the joking, he is not put me into the blacklist, otherwise why so many years to me.
十八、昨天我梦到我对象跟别人跑了，我在梦里哭得很伤心，醒来后发现原来我还没有对象，我就哭得更厉害了。
Yesterday I dreamed that my object ran with others, I cried in the dream very sad, woke up and found that I had no object, I cried more.
会持续更新美文图片
想了解更多精彩内容，快来关注阡陌花落
13个能笑死人的搞笑句子，笑料十足，专治各种不开心
13个扎心的爱情丧句，我从未遗弃爱情，只是爱情抛弃了我